How tightly are you holding onto your thoughts?

Do you find yourself getting stuck thinking about a difficult situation (say a fight with someone else), or worrying a lot? Well try this tool.

Grab a marker (or something similar) and then hold it in your hand. Now squeeze it as tightly as you can. Call that a 10. Hold that for 30 seconds and see what that experience is like. Now loosen it a little and hold it at a 5. See how that feels. Then hold it at a 1, nice and loose. See how that feels.

Now think about how you are holding onto whatever painful feeling or thought and ask yourself how tightly you are holding it. Give it a number between 1 and 10. Then ask yourself if you can hold it a little less tightly. You might be holding it at an 8 and it is not possible to get it to a 1, but maybe ask if you can hold it at a 7.

What would it look like for you to hold your painful thought or feeling a little less tightly? Play around with this and try it thought the day or week when you find yourself stuck in your head or worrying a lot. This isn’t about making the pain go away, but instead noticing how you are interacting with the pain and seeing if you can interact a little differently. If you want to find out more about my approach call me at 510-761-6706. You can also email me at . I serve the Santa Cruz, San Jose, Los Gatos, Soquel, Scotts Valley, and Area. I work with Adults and Teens and I have been in the mental health field for nearly 20 years. I am happy to talk and help.